How do the fairy-tales of the whites and the blacks differ?
The stories of whites start: Once upon a time...
The stories of blacks start: Yo, man, you won't believe what a f**k has happened to me...
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Why did the cannibal eat the tightrope walker?
He wanted a balanced meal.
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Heres what you do:
1. Dinner
2. Kiss
3. Movie
4. Sex
5. Bring her back home
6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting
Are you lost, ma'am?
Because Heaven's a long way from here.
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Chuck Norris occasionally smokes large cigars.
The last one was called the Hindenburg.
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What is a cannibal's favorite food?
Baked Beings.
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What do you do if an epileptic falls in your pool?
Throw in your laundry.
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Did you hear about the black guy that died on the highway?
He stuck his head out the window and his lips beat him to death.
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Q: What's the best part about sex with 28-year-olds?
A: There are twenty of them.
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Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours.
Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
While examining the the body of Mr. Schwartz, a mortician notices that Schwartz has the largest penis he has ever seen.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz," says the mortician, "But I can't send you to be cremated with a tremendously huge penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity."
The mortician removes the penis, places it in a jar and puts the jar in his briefcase. When he gets home, he decides to show it to his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he says, removing the jar from his briefcase.
"Oh my God!" she screams, "Schwartz is dead!"
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