Joke #5139

What's pink and chunky? A baby with leprosy.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: black humor

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? He got the gas bill.
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has 79.64 % from 436 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, money
A very old woman realizes that she's seen and done everything and the time has come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she decides to shoot herself through the heart. Not wanting to make a mistake, she phones her doctor and asks him the exact location of the heart. He tells her that the heart is located two inches below the left nipple. The old woman hangs up the phone, takes careful aim and shoots herself in the left knee.
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has 82.57 % from 271 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, old people, phone
Two bums are sitting talking. The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever! This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground. So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fucking one of them... had the best day ever." The second bum just laughs, "That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks. You know what I did? I fucked her all day long." The other bum interrupts, "Bull! You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life." The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good blowjob?" The other replies no. "How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a blow job?" To which the other replies, "How could she? She didn't have a head!"
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has 19.16 % from 226 votes. More jokes about: black humor, blonde, death, sex
Q: What's the best thing about ISIS jokes? A: The execution.
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has 79.54 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: black humor, terrorist
My friend's father died last night so I asked him "What was the cause of his father's death?" He said, "A bus passed over his finger!" I laughed and told him: "It is not a suitable cause." My friend said: "When the bus crashed, his finger was on his nose!"
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has 84.36 % from 274 votes. More jokes about: black humor, communication, death, friendship, travel
Q: What's red, white, and cries a lot? A: A baby with a razor!
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has 43.43 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, morbid
How do you make a baby drink? Stick it in the blender.
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor
What's black and red, wears high top Reeboks and cant go through a revolving door? A nigger with a spear through his head.
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has 16.33 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: black humor, black people
Piranhas in the aquarium: sink your finger, lose your finger-game!
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, fish, game
A beautiful young girl is about to undergo a minor operation. She’s laid on a hospital trolley bed with nothing on, except a sheet over her. The nurse pushes the trolley down the corridor towards the operating theatre, where she leaves the girl on the trolley outside, while she goes in to check whether everything is ready. A young man wearing a white coat approaches, lifts the sheet up and starts examining her naked body. He puts the sheet back and then walks away and talks to another man in a white coat. The second man comes over, lifts the sheet and does the same examinations. When a third man does the same thing, but more closely, she grows impatient and says: “All these examinations are fine and appreciated, but when are you going to start the operation?” The man in the white coat shrugged his shoulders: “I have no idea. We’re just painting the corridor.”
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has 80.50 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, hospital, women