Joke #2780

Sex without condoms is magical... A baby appears and father disappears.
Vote: has 68.34 % from 236 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Why do Jews watch porn backwards? Because their favorite part is when the hooker gives the money back.
Vote: has 79.17 % from 801 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: jewish, money, racist, sex
An old couple decide to get married after years of courting. They sit down to discuss the marriage arrangements and the prospective bridegroom brings up the subject of sex. ‘Oh dear,’ says his aging fiancée. ‘As far as sex goes I’d have to say, infrequently.’ ‘Pardon?’ replies the bridegroom. ‘Was that one word or two?’
Vote: has 62.98 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Why do women need guys? Vibrators don’t usually pay for drinks.
Vote: has 68.20 % from 103 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
What is that insensitive bit at the base of the penis called? The man.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, sex
A bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?" "Okay, sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is put the prisoner in the prison." And they made love for the first time and the husband was smiling with satisfaction. Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped." Turning on his side, he smiles and says, "Then we will have to re-imprison him." After the second time, the bride says, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!" The husband rises to the occasion and they made love again. The bride again says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again," to which the husband yelled, "Hey, it's not a life sentence!!!"
Vote: has 55.11 % from 71 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Two men visit a prostitute. The first man goes into the bedroom. He comes out ten minutes later and says, ‘Heck. My wife is better than that.’ The second man goes in. He comes out ten minutes later and says, ‘You know? Your wife IS better.’
Vote: has 78.11 % from 1084 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Your best friend has three girlfriends. Their names are Doe, Ray, and Me. All 3 want to do something special so they set up some dates. Three days ago Doe kisses him. Two days ago Ray gives him vaginal sex. Yesterday, who sucks his dick?
Vote: has 68.23 % from 1344 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dating, sex
Mary, a horny and sexy 23 year old and a handsome, single, sexy doctor Matt have an appointment together. Doctor: Well what's your problem madam? Mary: Well, there's something wrong with my tongue. Doctor: What's wrong with it? Mary: Examine it and you'll see. Doctor: Why don't you just- Mary: EXAMINE IT! Doctor: Fine. (Starts examining tongue, confused as there is nothing wrong with it.) Mary: (Suddenly pushes tongue into Matt's mouth) Doctor: (Pulls out tongue, furiously) Oh, so that's what's wrong with your tongue, eh? It's wanting sex. I see. I can fix that. (Goes to lock door, and rips off all of his clothes) Now your turn. Mary: Wow. I should have just asked. Doctor: (Starts to plunge in and out his dick from Mary's pussy.) Do you wanna make it more enjoyable? Mary: (Moaning and groaning sexually) Ooooooh yes.... Baby..... Yes.... Doctor: Ooooooh it feels SOOO good. (Starts to moan and groan sexually, he suddenly cums) Mary: Aaaaah a baby, fuck me more! Doctor: (Goes on top of Mary) I'm fucking you as hard as I can! When the session is finished, Mary wants to tell Matt something. Mary: That was great. But do you know why you got so aroused before? Doctors: Yes. It was very strange, I was not horny before. Mary: My tongue had viagra powder on it. That's why I put my tongue in your mouth.
Vote: has 67.78 % from 36 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, sex, viagra
Justin Timberlake didn't bring sexy back Chuck Norris did.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, music, sex
Q: Why do women have two holes so close together? A: In case you miss.
Vote: has 64.35 % from 88 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, women