Joke #2795

A school in the United States is on fire. One fireman is throwing the kids through the window, while the other one is standing on the ground and catching them. After half of an hour the upper fireman asks: Hey man, why aren't you catching black kids? Oh damn, I thought these were the burnt ones.

Q: Where do one-legged people eat? A: IHOP.

Q: What's blue and doesn't fit? A: A dead epileptic.

Someone going to work sees a crowd of people walking. Looking at the beginning of course, he sees a coffin behind a gentleman with a little dog followed by the crowd. Approaching the owner and he asks him: "What happened here, man?" "Pff, my mother-in-law died," he said. "Hush how sad eh… And, if allowed, how?" "My dog bit her…" "You don't tell me! Could you lend him to me just for tonight?" "Get in line!"

I gas the only problem I have with the wold now is all the deutchbags.

A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

Every night while Dave is having dinner his wife Natalie goes to the bedroom turns off the light and makes out with Daves friend Andy by the window. After some days Dave had doubt and leaving supper he went to the dark room only to hear whispers from the other side of the window. He pushes Natalie away goes near the window,unties his pant and put his arse facing the window. After a minute Andy puts a kiss on his butt cheek and says "Natalie, haven't u brushed ur teeth today?"

How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head.

Q: What's the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies? A: Hey y'all... Watch this!

I walked passed a burnt out building with a broken sign saying "Fireworks". How right they were.

How did they know that the driver had dandruff? They found his head and shoulders in the glove box.