Q: "How many members of the coalition does it take to screw in a light bulb?"
A: "We are not prepared to comment on specific numbers at this time."
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One of my friends returned from Afghanistan and I asked him if he is going to the party tomorrow.
He said he can't walk.
Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter.
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French Army rifles for sale – never fired and only dropped once!
Why did Osama Bin Laden kill his wife?
When she spread her legs he saw bush.
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Two men were boasting to each other about their old army days.
"Why, my outfit was so well drilled," declared one, "that when they presented arms all you could hear was slap, slap, click."
"Very good," conceded the other, "but when my company presented arms you'd just hear slap, slap, jingle."
"What was the jingle?" asked the first.
"Oh," replied the other offhand, "just our medals."
A US Army soldier sat in a bar with his head in his hands having just finished his first day of Airborne training.
His buddy sat down on the stool next to him and asked him what was the matter.
"I just finished my first day in Airborne training and it didn't go too well", he sighed.
"What happened?", his buddy asked.
"Well, we got over the jump zone, the green light came on and we all hooked up to the jump line.
We shuffled to the door and when it was my turn, I just froze. I couldn't jump."
"What happened then?", his buddy asked, concerned.
"Well the jump sargeant started yelling at me.
He said, Boy, if you don't jump right now, I'm going to shove my fist up your ass!"
"Did you jump?"
"Well, a little at first."
Why'd the Mexican army only bring 5000 soldiers to the Alamo?
There was only two vans.
Q: What is Iraq's national bird ?
A: Duck.
Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?"
"My father said it'd be a good idea, sir."
"Oh? And what does your father do?"
"He's in the Army, sir."