Joke #3370

How can you tell that elephants have been doing it in your garage? All your Hefty Bags are missing.
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A rabbit went to the fortune-teller, “what do you see in my future?” asked the rabbit. “Very soon,” replied the fortune-teller, “you will meet a pretty young girl who will want to know everything about you.” “That’s great!” said the rabbit, hopping up and down. “But when will I meet her?” “Next week in science class,” said the fortune-teller.
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What do you call a cow on a trampoline? A milkshake.
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How many animals can you get into a pair of tights? 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 beaver, 1 ass, 1 p*ssy, thousands of hares and a dead fish no one can ever find.
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Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water? He set a new lap record.
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I've just discovered a method for making wool out of milk. But doesn't that make the cow feel a little sheepish?
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A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading down the alley that had the bulls. They come up to the first bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 50 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “He mated 50 times in a year, you could learn from him.” They proceed to the next bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 65 times last year.” The wife turns to her husband and says, “This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month. You can learn from this one, also.” They proceeded to the last bull and his sign said: “This bull mated 365 times last year.” The wife’s mouth drops open and says, “WOW! He mated 365 times last year. That is ONCE A DAY! You could really learn from this one.” The man turns to his wife and says, “Go up and see if it was 365 times with the same cow.”
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What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.
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Whats the difference in a seagull and a babys diaper? A seagull flits across the shore and a baby shits across the floor.
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How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.
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What do you call a gay dinosaur?…… Mega-sore-ass.
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