Joke #3380

When is the best time to bury that baby you killed? When it starts talking to you again.
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has 13.43 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: disgusting

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How did Captain Hook die? He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!
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has 67.39 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, pirate
A lady goes to the doctor, and says: "Doc, I have this smell about me that I can't get rid of no matter what I do. Can you help me?" The doctor says, "yeah I can help you but I'll have to examine you. You'll have to take all your clothes off first." So the lady takes her clothes off. Right away the doctor says, "hold on, I'll be right back." A couple minutes later he comes back with an 8-foot stick that has a little hook on the end of it. The lady says, "oh doctor, what str going to do with that?" And the doctor says, as he's going through the movements of opening a high window, "well I'm going to open the window, it smells like shit in here."
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has 44.74 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, doctor, insulting, women
I've accepted every email offer I've ever received. My penis is now 235 feet long.
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Did you hear about the man who took Viagra and a laxative at the same time? He didn't know if he was coming or going.
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has 74.83 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, viagra
What's grosser than gross? Two Siamese twins connected at the tongue. What's even grosser than that? When one of them throws up.
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has 36.09 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long? A runny bunny.
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has 48.41 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, chocolate, disgusting, easter, food
Take a squirt gun into the rest room stall next to someone and shoot little drops over the wall every couple of seconds while pretending to pee.
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has 60.85 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: April fools, disgusting
It was the kindergarten teachers birthday and the students decided that they would each buy their teacher a gift. The first student, whose parents own a florist shop, gave her a present. She held it and said "I guess that it is flowers". "How did you guess?" asked the little boy. She laughed and thanked him. The second student, whose parents own a candy store, gave her a present. She held it and said, "I guess that is some candy." "How did you guess?" asked the little boy. She again laughed and thanked him also. The third student, whose parents own a bottle shop, gave her a box which was leaking. The teacher touched the liquid with her finger and tasted it. "Mmmmm is it wine?" she asked. "No," said the little girl. So she tasted it again. "Is it champagne?" she asked. "Noooo," replied the little girl, "It's a puppy."
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has 71.41 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: birthday, disgusting, student, teacher, wine
Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.
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has 48.11 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, redneck
How do you know if Dr. Dre has a high sperm count? Eminem has to chew before swallowing.
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has 27.24 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, music