Joke #6938

What's the difference between a leprechaun and gonorrhea? One's a cunning runt.

How do you make stew out of a leper? Put him in a Jacuzzi and turn it on full.

I met a girl who used masturbate to 2 girls 1 cup. And that kids, is how j met your mother.

What do you if you're trapped inside a whale? Run round and round till you're all pooped out!

A married couple go to a restaurant. A blonde waitress takes their order and returns several minutes later, carrying a plate with only a plain hamburger bun on it. The man asks, "Where's the burger?" The waitress lifts her arm and pulls out a burger from her armpit. "I was keeping it warm," she replies. The wife says, "Please cancel my hot dog order."

A couple goes to Mexico City on vacation and eats at a famous local restaurant. The waiter tells them they have a delicious special every Sunday, so the couple orders the special. With great fanfare, the waiter brings out a large silver serving platter with two huge steaming rounds of meat, juices dripping. It smells delicious and tastes even better. The couple is delighted with their meal, and the husband asks the waiter what fabulous meat was in the dish. "Senor," he explains, "each Saturday night, we have the bullfights, and that was the bull's balls you ate." The couple is a bit taken aback by what they have just eaten, but it was delicious, so they get over it. Six months later, the couple returns to Mexico City and decides to go to the same restaurant. Feeling adventuresome, they order the same dish. Once again, with great fanfare, the waiter brings out the huge silver serving dish and places it on the table. But this time, there are two tiny pieces of meat, barely enough for one. The man says, "Excuse me, but the last time we were here and ordered this dish, it was huge, more than enough for two. Why is this portion so small?" The waiter smiles and replies, "Well, you see, senor, sometimes the bull wins!"

Two cannibals are eating dinner and one says, "I hate my mother-in-law." The other replies, "Well, just eat your noodles, then."

Little Red Riding Hood went to her grandma's house and found her laying in bed. Little Red Riding Hood said, "Grandma, what big eyes you have!" Grandma: "The better to see you with, my dear." Little Red Riding Hood: "Grandma, what big ears you have!" Grandma: "The better to hear you with, my dear." Little Red Riding Hood: "Grandma, what a big mouth you have!" Grandma: "Of course I do, have you seen Grandpa's d**k?!"

What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? A salad shooter.

Q: What's the difference between boogers and broccoli? A: Kids don't eat broccoli.

Two sperms. The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?" The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."