Joke #3385

Men are like buses. They have spare tires and smell funny.
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A man bought a new car. Next day he is driving his car to office. On the way he was waiting for the Signal. Suddenly he opened the door and got down. Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him, "How much should I pay to turn right?" The Policeman was astonished and asked, "Why are you asking like this?" Then man showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: "Free Left Turn"
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
My wife was dying. I was by her bedside. She said in a tired voice, "Theres something I must confess." "Shhh" I said, "theres nothing to confess. Everythings alright." "No I must die in peace. I had s*x with your brother, your best friend, his best friend and your father!" "I know," I whispered "Thats why i posion you, now close your eyes!"
Vote: has 72.71 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, men, wife
2 cannibals having dinner. 1st says to 2nd, "Your wife makes a lovely stew." 2nd answers, "Yes but I will miss her."
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
A man walks into a bar and notices his friend sitting alone staring at a tiny man on the table playing the piano. "Wow, look how small he is, where did you get him?!" Says the man. "Oh, well there's this genie round the back of bar, and he grants you whatever wish you want." Sure enough, the man goes round the back of the bar and there sits a genie. "You grant wishes right?" "Yes." replies the genie. "Hmm, I'd like a million bucks." Then, out of nowhere, a million ducks appear, and waddle behind the annoyed man as he goes back into the bar. "Look, that genie gave me ducks instead of bucks!" His friends sitting at the table replies, "Well yeah, do you really think I asked for a twelve inch pianist?"
Vote: has 81.61 % from 226 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, duck, genie, men, music
Why do doctors slap babies' butts right after they're born? To knock the penises off the smart ones.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, men
Women prefer the simple things in life… like men.
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, men, women
It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.
Vote: has 48.02 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q: What is difference between man and Superman? A: Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
Vote: has 46.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young girl at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special." At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. "Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it." The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated by check. "I know you need to make sure the check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank on Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said. Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. "There's no money in that account." "I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?"
Vote: has 72.77 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? At the circus the clowns don't talk.
Vote: has 24.92 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, men