Q: What would men do if they had breasts?
A: They'd stay at home and play with them all day.
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Men are like.....Commercials.
You can't believe a word they say
Sex is when a guys communication,
enters a girls information,
to increase the population,
for a younger generation,
do you get the information...
or do you need a demonstration.
How does a man show he's planning for the Future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
What do you have when you have two little balls in your hand?
A man's undivided attention.
Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?
Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish.
The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home.
The second guy wishes the same.
The third guy says "I'm lonely.
I wish my friends were back here."
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Q: There is a $100 bill sitting in the middle of a 4 way intersection, at one side there is a man hating dike, at another side, there is Santa, at another side there is the Easter Bunny, and at the las side there is a man loving lesbian. Who gets the $100 bill?
A: The man hating dike because all others are a figure of your imagination.
What do you call a handcuffed man?
Trustworthy.
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, there's a piece of lettuce sticking out of my bottom."
The doctor asks him to drop his trousers and examines him.
The man asks, "Is it serious, doctor?"
The doctor replies, "I'm sorry to tell you, but this is just the tip of the iceberg."