A man is talking to God.
"God, how long is a million years?"
God answers, "To me, it's about a minute."
"God, how much is a million dollars?"
"To me, it's a penny."
"God, may I have a penny?"
"Wait a minute."
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Prospective husband: Do you have a book called "Man, The Master of Womem"?
Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male?
All he's concerned with is legs, breasts, and thighs.
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they?
A: His left hand and his right hand.
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Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up?
What did God say after she made Eve?
"Practice makes perfect."
Why are blonde jokes so short?
So men can remember them.
What does a man call true love?
An erection.
A real man would never cry in public unless:
He watched a movie in which a heroic dog dies to save his master.
Or if Heidi klum unbuckled her shirt.
Or if he accidentally dropped crates full of beer.
Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.