Joke #3511

Doc, says Steve, "I want to be castrated." "What on Earth for?" "It's something I've been thinking about for a long time. If you don't do it, I'll just go to another doctor." "OK, but it's against my better judgment." Steve has his operation. The next day he walks down the hospital corridor very slowly, legs apart, with his drip stand. Heading toward him is another patient walking exactly the same way. "Hi there," says Steve, "It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me." "Yeah," says the patient, "I finally decided I'd like to be circumcised." Steve's eyes widen in horror, "Oh no! That's the word!"

Q: What do you get when you cross a penis and a potato? A: A dic-tater.

Q: Why are there only snow men and not snow women? A: Because only men are dumb enough to stand out in the snow without a coat.

Husband: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? Wife: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.

How are men like diplomas? You spend lots of time getting one, but once you have it, you don't know what to do with it.

Men and women were created equal but women continued to improve.

Coco Chanel once said that you should put perfume on places where you want to be kissed by a man. But hell does that burn!

What do you call a woman that works like a man?? Lazy.

Q: What do you get if you cross a dirty politician with a filthy womanizer? A: Chelsea.

A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer"

How many men would it take to mop a floor? No one knows; they've never done it.