When I see you, there's a Ruthian blast in my pants.
High five!
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Twenty feet below sea level, a diver notices another guy at the same depth with no scuba gear.
The diver goes down another 10 feet, and the guy joins him a minute later.
The diver goes below 15 more feet, and a minute later, the same guy joins him.
The diver takes out a waterproof pad and pencil and writes, "How are you able to stay this deep without equipment?"
The guy takes the pencil and pad and writes, "I'm drowning, you moron!"
Chuck Norris can dunk a basketball using his feet.
Vote:
Everyone should stop hating on Lance Armstrong.
He won 7 Toure De France's on DRUGS!
When I'm on drugs, I can't even FIND my bicycle.
My yoga instructor says I need to work on my breathing.
But I mean, 41 years, still alive.
I kinda got it.
There was a competition of arm wrestling between Chuck Norris and Superman.
And guess what, the loser had to wear his undies over his pants!
Vote:
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They don't know where home is.
Vote:
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
Vote:
Once Chuck Norris swam all the oceans for 7 days and oceans got cold.
Vote:
A man arrives at the Pearly Gates and St. Peter asks him if he's done any good.
The man says no. So St. Peter asks the man to give an account of his bravery.
The man says, "I was refereeing a match in London between England and Germany.
The score was 0-0 and there was only one more minute of play when I awarded a penalty against England."
"Yes," responds St. Peter, "That was a real act of bravery.
Can you tell me when this took place?"
"Certainly," the man replies.
"About three minutes ago."
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Vote: