After 8 rounds the boxer comes back in his corner, extremely grinded. The couch says to him: You should better take a decision! You want the champion title or the Nobel for peace...
Q: What has 2 arms, 3 legs, and 4 feet? A: The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Chuck Norris can dunk a basketball using his feet.
"Waiter, these noodles are a bit crunchy." Waiter: "That's because they're the chopsticks, sir."
Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
Q. What do you call 300 white men chasing a black man? A. The PGA tour
A husband and wife were golfing when suddenly the wife asked, "Honey, if I died would you get married again?" The husband said, "No sweetie." The woman said, "I'm sure you would." So the man said, "Okay, I would" Then the woman asked, "Would you let her sleep in our bed?" And the man replied, "Ya, I guess so." Then the wife asked, "Would you let her use my golf clubs?" And the husband replied, "No, she's left handed."
Your mama so fat, that she can use herself as a bowling ball and get 10 strikes in all of the lanes!
So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.
Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The American jumped off and shouted "God save America!" The English man jumped off and shouted "God Save The Queen!" The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted "God save the person who I land on!''