Fed up with your computer winning at chess?
Try it at kick-boxing instead!
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Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office. I will find you. You have my Word.
Chuck Norris does not know about this website.
If he did he would have just deleted the internet.
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The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball."
Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"
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What do you get if you cross a computer with a herb?
A thyme machine.
One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. All of a sudden, the car broke down.
The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke."
The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don't think it's getting gas."
The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system."
All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?"
The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."
Why was the computer tired when he got home?
Because he had a hard drive.
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I dropped my laptop into the ocean the other day.
Now I have a Dell rolling in the deep.
If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I'd antialias my graphics!
What do you call a bent iPhone 6 plus?
A dead wringer.
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Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
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