What do you call a computer that takes 15 minutes to start, freezes if you try to do more than one thing at a time, crashes regularly and causes you to swear under your breath throughout the day?
Cutting edge.
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A foo walks into a bar, takes a look around and says: "Hello world!"
What would a computer geek is going to do after seeing a beautiful woman?
"Immediately start downloading it."
A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a lamp.
Upon rubbing the lamp a genie appeared who stated "I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish."
The programmer pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said "I'd like there to be a just and last peace among the people in the middle east."
The genie responded, "Gee, I don't know. Those people have been fighting since the beginning of time. I can do just about anything, but this is beyond my limits."
The programmer then said, "Well, I am a programmer and my programs have a lot of users. Please make all the users satisfied with my programs, and let them ask sensible changes"
Genie: "Uh, let me see that map again."
Q: My shift keys have little arrows on them. Does that mean the *real* shift keys are located above them, and these keys are just little signs to point them out?
A: Nope, they're the Real McCoy.
The little arrows mean "up", as in "look up at the screen".
Your keyboard is telling you to learn to touch type and quit staring at your fingers.
Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
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A life? Cool… Where can I download one of those?
C program run.
C program crash.
C programmer quit.
Chuck Norris does not know about this website.
If he did he would have just deleted the internet.
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A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
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