Joke #3734

How do teddy bears keep their den cool in summer? (They use bear conditioning!)
Vote:
has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: kids

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach. After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boy's position. He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow and, placing his hand kindly on the child's shoulder leans over and gives the doorbell a sold ring. Crouching down to the child's level, the priest smiles benevolently and asks, "And now what, my little man?" To which the boy replies, "Now we run!"
Vote:
has 74.54 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: kids, priest
At a Whitehouse party for past presidents. Michelle Obama caught Barron Trump making faces at Sasha. Michelle walked over to reprimand the child and said, "Barron, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Baron looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Obama, you can't say you weren't warned."
Vote:
has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: kids, mean, political, ugly, women
One day a mom was cleaning junior's room and in the closet she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word. She finally asked him, "Well what should we do about this?" Dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."
Vote:
has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: kids
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were having a conversation one fine Sunday evening. One remarked to the other, ‘I got a new hearing device and it works fine?' The second said, ‘oh yes, my grandchildren just love the gifts of my choice.' The third one who noticed the hearing device in the ear of the first one asked, what kind is it?' The one with the brand new hearing device answered ‘about 6 O'clock'. All three of them looked up in the birds in the sky and said, "Birds of the same feather ‘flock' together."
Vote:
has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, kids, old people, time
Q: In which room we cannot live? A: Mushroom.
Vote:
has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: kids
What do you call a old snowman? Water.
Vote:
has 65.91 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: kids
Why is it nice being a baby? It’s a nappy time.
Vote:
has 11.98 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: kids
So God is getting a bit bored in heaven, and he asks his archangel Michael, "Michael, I need to get away from it all for a bit. Where should I go to clear my head?" Michael replies, "Well, you could always go to Pluto. You could go create a mountain and ski, have a bit of fun." God says, "No, I don't think so. I don't do so well with the cold, and frostbite was definitely not one of my better creations." The archangels says, "Alright, well you could always try Mercury. It's nice and warm, you could just take a bit of time to relax, get a nice tan." "Michael," God says, "do you see how white I am? I would burn to a crisp." Michael replies, "Alright, well then why don't you go to Earth?" "Fuck that," God says, "last time I went there I got some girl pregnant and I never heard the end of it."
Vote:
has 55.25 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: geography, god, heaven, kids, sex
When is a door sweet and tasty? When its jammed!
Vote:
has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: kids
An Arabic kid joined my football team. All he did was blow the plays.
Vote:
has 46.60 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: black humor, ethnic, football, kids, racist