Q: How did the sand get wet?
A: The sea weed!
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Three kids were smoking behind the shed.
"My dad can blow smoke through his nose!" boasted the first.
"Ha, mine can blow smoke through this ears!" countered the second boy.
"That’s nothing," piped up the third. "My dad can blow smoke through his arse. I know,‘cos I’ve seen the nicotine stains on his undies."
Police Officer: "How high are you?"
Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"
You can't buy happiness but you can buy weed… and that's pretty close.
Q: What does a cooked chicken and a stoner who is afraid of everything have in common?
A: They are both baked chickens.
Q: If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving?
A: The cop!
Your mama is so short when she tried to get high she couldn't.
Yo mama so short when she smokes weed, she cant even get high.
Q: What did the Nickelback fan say to the other Nickelback fan when they ran out of weed?
A: Man, this music sucks.
There was a boy and his mother was about to go to work.
She said, "Do not open the door for nobody".
The boy said, "Okay."
So after the mother left a girl came to their house and she said to the boy, "Let me in."
The boy said, "I don’t want to, maybe tomorrow”"
So the girl went to the window and started knocking on it.
Once again she said, "Let me in."
The boy finally gave up and let her in.
So once she got in she said, "Let’s go upstairs."
The boy said, "I don’t want to, maybe tomorrow."
The girl kept asking him so he finally gave up.
When his mama came into his room she said, "Get off that girl."
The boy said, "I don’t want to, maybe tomorrow!"