Computer users are divided into three types: novice, intermediate and expert. Novice users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate users: people who don’t know how to fix their computer after they’ve just pressed a key that broke it. Expert users: people who break other people’s computers.
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed... Compile again, 100 little bugs in the code.
Q:Why did the computer lose its trust relationship with the domain? A:Because it was corrupted in active directory and needed to be removed and re-added again!
If you see the Blue Screen of Death on your laptop... it's because Chuck Norris found out you were reading Chuck Norris jokes.
Where's the best place to hide a body? Page two of Google.
Customer: “My youngest son was surfing the web last night and to my shock he was at a British comedy site.” Tech Support: “Yes, what is the problem?” Customer: “The ‘.uk’ at the end — doesn’t that stand for United Kingdom?” Tech Support: “Yes.” Customer: “Just great — I knew it! He’s in trouble now! He was there for almost a half hour! How much does AOL charge for long distance?” Tech Support: “It does not work that way. You can surf anywhere without long distance charges.” Customer: “No, I am sure AOL charges extra. It doesn’t make any sense that they wouldn’t. England is a long way away, they would lose millions not to.” After trying to explain how the web worked, the customer refused to take my word and said she was going to call AOL. A while later she called back. Customer: “Well, AOL said you were correct; no long distance charge for overseas web sites. I do have another question I thought of after I hung up with AOL.” Tech Support: “Yes?” Customer: “Do you think they charge extra for long distance email?” Tech Support: “Trust me — they don’t.” Customer: “Wonderful! My oldest son works in Sweden. He sends us email, but I was always afraid to reply because I didn’t know how much it would cost, so I just called him on the phone. This will save us lots of money! Still if AOL was smart they would charge for this service.”
I keep hitting “escape”, but I’m still here.
James Bond got this email from a friend: CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?
Q: Which Bible character had no parents? A: Joshua, son of Nun (Joshua 1:1).
Two bloggers chatting: Mom: Son, it’s snowing so nice. Son: Where, Give me the link please.