What’s the difference between ‘Oooh!’ and ‘Aaah!’?
About three inches.
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Wanna go on an 'ate' with me? I'll give you the 'D' later.
Two sperm are in the body looking for the egg when one of them starts to wonder why it is taking so long.
He asks the other sperm, "aren't we near the uterus yet?"
"No," replied the other sperm, "we haven't even gotten to the esophagus."
We're like hot chocolate and marshmallows...
You're hot and I wanna be on top of you.
What did the Irish spinster keep saying in her prayers?
‘Good Lord, please have Murphy on me…’
Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their sex lives.
Karen said, "I call my husband the dentist because nobody can drill like he does."
Joanne giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner, because of his incredible shaft."
Kathy quietly sipped her whiskey until Joanne finally asked, "Well, what do you call your boyfriend?"
Kathy frowned and said, "The postman." Looking puzzeled Joanne asked, "Why the postman?"
"Because… he always delivers late and half the time it’s in the wrong box."
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
After a long day of winter sporting, we headed back to the ski lodge.
As it was small, a cramped place to stay, we decided it was most fitting to sleep in the same bed.
Myself in the middle and my two friends either side of me.
In the middle of the night, the guy on the right woke up and said, "I have had a dream where I was given the best handjob ever!"
A few minutes later, the guy on my left woke up and said: "I have had a dream that I was given the best handjob ever!"
I replied, "well that's funny... I thought I was skiing."
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
What’s the definition of a Yankee?
Same thing as a ‘quickie’ but you do it yourself.