Outgoing e-mails have tobacco stains on them.
What did the spider do on the computer? Made a website!
Q: What do you call a programmer from Finland? A: Nerdic.
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change it, and two to complain about how bad GE's customer support is.
The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.
Computer users are divided into three types: novice, intermediate and expert. Novice users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate users: people who don’t know how to fix their computer after they’ve just pressed a key that broke it. Expert users: people who break other people’s computers.
Yo mama is so stupid that she bought curtains for her computer just because it had Windows.
Funny facts about Google users: 50% of people use Google well as a search engine. The rest 50% of them use it to check if their internet is connected
What did the computer do at lunchtime? Had a byte!
Your mama so stupid she bought tickets to Xbox Live.
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?" The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field." "You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist. "I do" replies the man. "How did you know?" "Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone." The man below replies, "You must work in management." "I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?" "Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."