Joke #4107

‘A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.’ Bob Hope
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She was so rich she even had monograms on the bags under her eyes.
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You will never see a car worth over \$10,000 with an Obama sticker on the back.
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"Hello" "Hello" "Is that you, James?" "Yes, this is James." "Are you sure this is James." "Yes I'm sure, this is James!" "This is Robert... can you lend me twenty dollars?" "I'll tell James when he comes in."
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A guy walks into a bar and sits on a stool. In front of him he see's a big jar full of change and a little card that reads: "Hello, if you would like to win all of this money you have to make the horse at the end of the bar laugh. COST \$5" So, he puts in five dollars and takes the horse into the bathroom. Two minutes later they come out and the horse is laughing so hard that he pissed on the floor. So the guy takes the money and leaves. The next day the same guy walks in the bar again and see's the horse and the jar, this time it says: "You can win all of this if you make the horse cry. COST \$10" So he puts in 10 dollars and takes the horse into the bathroom. Four minutes later they come out and the horse is crying like no body ever had. So the guy takes the jar but before he could leave the bartender asks "How did you do that?" The guy says "The first time I told him my dick was bigger than his and the second time I showed him!"
Vote: has 76.26 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

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Vote: has 81.09 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

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Teen Girl to Friend: "For the prom, I'm renting a limo, spending \$500 on a new dress and bringing in the best makeup artist in the state to do my hair." Teacher who has overheard the conversation: "Wow, that's more than I spent for my wedding!" Teen Girl: "Yeah, well you can get married three or four times, but a prom is a once in a lifetime experience."
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After 40 years of hard work, a man retired with \$5,000,000.00 which he had gained through courage, diligence, initiative, skill, devotion to duty, thrift, efficiency, shrewd investment. And the death of an uncle who left him \$4,999,999.50.
Vote: has 81.29 % from 98 votes. Send joke:

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How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.
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