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A Help desk guy speaking to a lady user...
Help desk: Double click on "My Computer".
Lady: I can't see your computer...
Help desk: No... click on "My Computer" on your computer.
Lady: How the hell can I click on your computer from my computer?!
Help desk: There is an icon labelled "My Computer" on your computer... double click on it...
Lady: What the hell is your computer doing on my computer?
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Who said Windows 98 is a virus was wrong.
Why?
Because a virus does something.
The box said "Requires Windows Vista or better".
So I installed LINUX.
What is the other name for the ‘Intel Inside?'
"The warning label." {Intel inside.......fool is outside}.
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three.
One to change it, and two to complain about how bad GE's customer support is.
What do you get when you try to cross a pit bull with a computer?
A lot of bites.
When Chuck Norris surfs the Internet, he actually surfs on a virtual wave of 1's and 0's.
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The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.
A computer programmer has been missing from work for over a week.
Finally someone notices and calls the police.
They break down the door of his flat where they find him dead in the shower, an empty bottle of shampoo next to his body.
The programmer seems to have died from a combination of exposure and exhaustion.
The puzzle is explained when the police read the instructions on the shampoo bottle – ‘Wet hair.
Apply shampoo. Rinse. Repeat.’
Once upon a time, a computer programmer drowned at sea.
Many were on the beach and heard him cry out, “F1! F1!”, but no one understood.
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