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If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I'd antialias my graphics!
Chuck Norris can infect a mac with pc viruses.
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Q: How did the elephant destroy the database?
A: His truncate it.
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost.
He reduces height and spots a man down below.
He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."
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Why was the computer tired when he got home?
Because he had a hard drive.
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Two programmers in a bar:
Do you see that chick there?
Look at here “properties”!
Yes, I’ve already “tested” here last night... they are read-only!
Q: What deodorant do SEO consultants wear?
A: Lynx
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This website may not be idiot proof, but at least it’s dimwit resistant.
What is a cursor?
Someone having computer problems.
If you type Chuck Norris into Microsoft Word, the little paper-clip just hangs himself.
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