Joke #4148

Condoms are not completely safe. A friend of mine was wearing one and he got hit by a bus.
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has 68.84 % from 354 votes. More jokes about: sex

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An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants and raised her legs. The dentist said: "Excuse me; I 'm not a gynecologist." "I know," said the old lady "I want you to take my husband's teeth out."
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has 73.37 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: dentist, dirty, husband, old people, sex
Q: Ever had sex while camping? A: It's fucking intents.
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has 62.00 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
It’s the morning after the honeymoon. The wife says, ‘You know, you’re a really lousy lover.’ The husband replies, ‘How can you possible tell that after only 30 seconds.’
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has 55.58 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: sex
In an elementary school, the teacher gives school work to the class. Everybody writes except little John. The teacher asks him: John, why aren’t you writing? I’m exhausted because of sex. That should not be a problem, write with your left hand.
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has 57.91 % from 152 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%? A: Her wedding cake.
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has 78.87 % from 1297 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage, sex, wedding
Q: What did dick say to rubber? A: "Cover me I'm going in."
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has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex
An Irish priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying "I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork... Have you actually ever tasted it?" The Rabbi said, "I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion." Then the Rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "Your religion, too... I know you’re supposed to be celibate. But..." The priest replied, "Yes, I know what you’re going to ask. I have succumbed once or twice." There was silence for a while. Then the Rabbi peeped around the newspaper he was reading and said, "Better than pork, isn’t it?"
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has 70.78 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: priest, religious, sex, travel
The doc told a guy that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer during the act. The man decided, "What the hell, I'll try it," He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn't do it in his office. He thought about the restroom, but that was too open. He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe. Finally, he realized his solution. On his way home, he pulled his truck over on the side of the highway. He got out and crawled underneath as if he was examining the truck. Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started to play with his unit. He closed his eyes and thought of his lover. As he grew closer to the big finish, he felt a quick tug at the bottom of his pants. Not wanting to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm, he kept his eyes shut and replied, "What?" He heard, "This is the police. What's going on down there?" The man replied, "I'm checking out the rear axle, it's busted." Came the reply, "Well, you might as well check your brakes too while you're down there because your truck rolled down the hill 5 minutes ago."
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has 79.56 % from 1085 votes. More jokes about: sex
While making love, he says: Darling, let's do 68! 68??? What's that? You do it to me and I'll owe you one.
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has 41.91 % from 278 votes. More jokes about: sex
Mom: If a boy touches your boobs say "don't" and if he touches your pussy say "stop"? Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said "don’t stop"
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has 69.39 % from 133 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex