What’s the difference between an aerobics instructor and a torturer?
The torturer would apologize first.
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What's the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit?
One's a glueless kit and the other's a clueless git!
Chuck Norris hit a home run in a football game.
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Chuck Norris won the Boston marathon in New York.
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A Catholic, a Baptist and a Mormon are bragging about the size of their families.
"I have four boys and my wife is expecting another," says the Catholic. "One more son, and I'll have a basketball team,"
"That's nothing," says the Baptist. "I have 10 boys now, and my wife is pregnant with another child. One more son, and I'll have a football team."
"That's nothing," says the Mormon. "I have 17 wives. One more wife, and I'll have a golf course."
Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.
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There was a tragic end to the water polo championships – all the horses drowned.
Why are baseball players in trouble with the law so often?
They always hit and run.
Q: What do you get when a dinosaur scores a touchdown?
A: A dino-score.