What’s the difference between an aerobics instructor and a torturer? The torturer would apologize first.
What games do ants play with elephants? Squash!
Why is there no mexican olympics? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim is already across the boarder.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought "Dunkin' Donuts" was a basketball team.
Chuck Norris can break his opponents serve with an ace.
Paddy asks Murphy, 'Why do scuba divers fall off their boats backwards?" Murphy replies, "If they fell forwards they'd still be on the f*cking boat!"
"Football is a game when 22 big, strong players run around like crazy for two hours while 50,000 people who really need the exercise sit in the stands and watch them."
Barcelona beats every team in the world, Chuck Norris can beat Barcelona... by himself.
Did you hear John McEnroe went for an audition for the latest Harry Potter film? They turned him down, saying "You cannot be Sirius!"
What did the trampolinist say? ‘Life has its ups and downs, but I always bounce back.’ Tennis
What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? The NBA