Why do bankruptcy lawyers expect to be paid?
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Not all the warrants, can be called milky cows, says a lawyer to a colleague of his, some of them are like the mice in the church.
Got for as lawyers that we know how to milk the mice...
Q: A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender.
Do you trust your fellow officers?
A: Yes sir, with my life.
Q: What happens when you give Viagra to lawyers?
A: They grow taller!
A junior partner in a law firm is sent to represent a client accused of murder.
After a long trial, the case is won and the client acquitted.
The young lawyer telegraphs his firm with the message, ‘Justice prevailed’.
The senior partner telegraphs back, ‘Appeal immediately’.
If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, how many orchards does it take for a lawyer?
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?
One’s a scum-sucking bottom dweller, the other’s a fish!
Q: How many lawyers does it take to build a wall?
A: Depends on how deep you stack them.
Q: What did the Lawyer say to the lesbian?
A: One slip of the tongue and you will be in s**t!
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A lawyer boarded an airplane in New Orleans with a box of frozen crabs and asked a blonde stewardess to take care of them for him.
She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator.
He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out.
Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.
Shortly before landing in New York, she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the lawyer who gave me the crabs in New Orleans, please raise your hand."
Not one hand went up...so she took them home and ate them.
How are a lawyer and a prostitute different?
The prostitute stops fucking you after you’re dead.
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