Being poor has its advantages.
For example your keys are never in your other trousers.
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Yo momma is so poor she ran after a trash can truck with her shoping list.
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar that reads:
CHEESEBURGER: $1.50
CHICKEN SANDWICH: $2.50
HAND JOB: $10.00
He walks up to the bar and beckons one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks.
"Can I help you?" she asks.
"I was wondering," whispers the man. "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?"
"Yes," she purrs. "I am."
The man replies, "Well, wash your hands. I want a cheeseburger."
Two lawyers are in a bank, when, suddenly, armed robbers burst in, waving guns and yelling for everyone to freeze.
While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the lawyers, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables.
While this is going on, one of the lawyers jams something into the other lawyer's hand.
Without looking down, the second lawyer whispers: "What is this?"
The first lawyer replies: "It's the $100 I owe you."
A man noticed that his credit card had been stolen but didn't report it.
The thief was spending less then his wife.
Q: What do you get when you cross a pilgrim with a democrat?
A: A god-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have.
In 1996, Florida physical therapist Paul Shimkonis sued his local nudie bar claiming whiplash from a lap dancer's large breasts.
Shimkonis felt he suffered physical harm and mental anguish from the breasts, which he claimed felt like "cement blocks" hitting him.
Shimkonis sought justice in the amount of $15,000, which was denied.
Hitler got a heart attack when he saw the gas bill.
Vote:
Q: Why do beavers spend a fortune on the Internet?
A: They never want to log off.
Yo mama so poor a man broke in her house a gave her money.