When a teacher closes his eyes, why should it remind him of an empty classroom?
Because there are no pupils to see!
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Seems like school and microwave minutes are longer than regular minutes.
“Dad, can you write in the dark?”
“I think so. What is it you want me to write?”
“Your name on this report card.”
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love.
In college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.
A little girl took her report card home and showed it to mom.
The mother was very disappointed by all the very low grades.
"Well look on the bright side" said the child, "you know for sure I don't cheat."
Q: What do dogs do after they finish obedience school?
A: They get their masters.
One day, a young boy was asked by his teacher to tell him what the chemical formula for water was.
The boy replied with "H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O".
The Teacher was stunned. "That's not right, how did you come up with that?"
The boy said, "Last week you said it was H2O!"
Ms.Battle: Henry, I hope I didn't see you copying Casey's math test.
Henry: I hope you didn't either.
What is the longest word in the English language?
Smiles: there is a mile between the first and last letters!
Yo mama so fat when she walked out in August in her yellow sun dress and the kids said mommy its time for school.
A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17."
The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands.
He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17.
Every hand went up.
The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying."