How do you make a blonde’s eyes sparkle? Shine a torch into her ear.
What did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? ‘It’s okay, Daddy, I’m not hurt.’
What did the blonde’s right leg say to her left leg? Nothing, they’ve never met!
Q: Why is a blonde like a turtle? A: They both get fucked up when they're on their backs.
A blonde returned home from work and was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She called the police immediately to report the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out onto the porch. The sight of the cop and his dog made her shudder. She put her face in her hands as she sat down on the steps and began moaning. "What's the moaning all about, ma'am?" asked the officer. The blonde replied, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen, so I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a blind policeman!"
Me: If a blonde girl and brunette girl jumped off a cliff at the same time, who would hit the ground first? Friend: I don't know, who? Me: The brunnete, the blonde had to ask for directions.
How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? Knock on the door.
Boy1: A blonde and brunette are on the top of a building. Who falls off first? Boy2: The blonde? Boy1: No, she has to ask for directions on how.
What do you call ten blondes at the bottom of the pool? Air pockets.
I'm a blonde! I'm a blonde, yay! B-L-O...? I'm a blonde, yay!
Two blondes walk into a building... you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.