How do you make a blonde’s eyes sparkle?
Shine a torch into her ear.
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Why does a man prefer blondes?
Men always like intellectual company.
A blonde made several attempts to sell her old car.
She was having a lot of problems finding a buyer because the car had 340,000 miles on it.
She discussed her problem with a brunette that she worked with at a bar.
The brunette suggested, "There may be a chance to sell that car easier, but it's not going to be legal."
"That doesn't matter at all," replied the blonde.
"All that matters it that I am able to sell this car."
"Alright," replied the brunette.
In a quiet voice, she told the blonde:
"Here is the address of a friend of mine.
He owns a car repair shop around here.
Tell him I sent you, and he will turn the counter back on your car to 40,000 miles.
Then it shouldn't be a problem to sell your car."
The following weekend, the blonde took a trip to the mechanic on the brunette's advice.
About one month after that, the brunette saw the blonde and asked, "Did you sell your car?"
"No!" replied the blonde.
"Why should I?
It only has 40,000 miles on it."
Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours?
A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.
Two blondes are sitting on a bench at the park.
One says to the other,"Hey, which is farther, California or the moon?"
The other blonde says,"Well, duh!
Can you see California?"
Two blondes fell down a hole.
One said, "It's dark in here isn't it?" The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see!"
There was a blonde who was at an all blonde football game.
At halftime she was called down to answer questions to see if she could win $1000.
The first question was what is 10 plus 11?
She hesitates and says, "hm.. 5!"
The host says "No, I'm sorry thats incorrect."
All of the blondes in the stadium chanted "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"
So the host agrees and said, "Ok how about 5 plus 5."
She answers and says "20".
Again all the blondes chanted "Give her another chance, give her another chance."
So the host agrees again and says, "OK, last chance, what is 2 plus 2."
The blonde says "4!" and the audience says "Give her another chance give her another chance!"
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said, "You know,it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
To this, the other blonde replies, "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
A blonde goes on a hot date and ends up making out with the guy in his car.
The guy asks if she would like to go in the backseat.
"No!" yells the blonde.
Things get even hotter, and the guy asks again.
"For the last time, no!" says the blonde.
Frustrated, the guy asks, "Well, why the hell not?"
The blonde says, "Because I wanna stay up here with you!"
A blonde girl walks in the street and sees a banana peel.
Sad she was, thinking...damn I will stumble again...!