Joke #4344

We were so poor the only way I could afford to get my suit pressed was to ride the subway during rush hour.
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has 34.78 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money

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A Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong. "All right children, let's take another example," she said. "If I were to get into a man's pocket and take his wallet with all his money, what would I be?" Little Johnny raises his hand, and with a confident smile, he blurts out, "You'd be his wife!"
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has 81.19 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, money, school, teacher, wife
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying for it."
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Being poor has its advantages. For example your keys are never in your other trousers.
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: money
How much money did the bronco have? Only a buck!
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has 58.51 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown. She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep. She goes up to the farmer and ask, "If I guess how many sheep you have can I have one?" The farmer nodded. She continued. "159" The farmer is surprised. "How did you know?" "Lucky guess" She grabs one and gets in her car. The farmer comes up and says, "If I can guess your real hair color can I get my dog back?"
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has 67.98 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, dog, math, money
William: May I have some money for the man crying outside ? Mum: What crying man ? William: The one that's crying, 'Ice cream! Ice Cream !'
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: food, money
If you think nobody care if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
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has 76.80 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: life, money
A man sat down at a bar and told the bartender, "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can piss into the cup all the way over there on the other side of the bar and not miss a single drop." The bartender said, "There is no way you can do that. Sure, I'll bet you three hundred dollars." The man then begins to undo his pants and begins pissing. He starts pissing all over the bar, spraying on the bottles and the bartender, not making a single drop in the cup. The bartender starts smiling and laughing and says, "That's it, you owe me three hundred dollars." The man then gets up and walks over to the pool table and starts laughing and shaking hands with the men standing there. He walks back to bar, sits down and starts laughing at the bartender and hands him the money. The bartender asks, "Why are you laughing? You just lost the bet." The man said, "I'm laughing because I bet those guys over there one thousand dollars that I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing when I was done."
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has 86.02 % from 467 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, money
He was so mean he used to give his children £1 each instead of an evening meal, then charged them £2 for breakfast.
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has 40.95 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: money
"Dad, your Father's Day gift is another year of not having to pay for my wedding."
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has 79.96 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, money, wedding