Joke #4389

A man goes into a library and asks where he can find books on suicide. ‘First row on the left,’ replied the librarian. The man replies, ‘But I’ve already looked in that section. It’s empty.’ ‘I’m not surprised,’ says the librarian. ‘They don’t often bring them back.'
Vote:
has 65.56 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What do you get when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Dough Nuts!
Vote:
has 50.67 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: dirty
The matchmaker approached a single woman and told her he had a husband for her. “I’m ashamed to bring this up,” he said, “but the man wants to be sure you are compatible in bed. He wants, he says, a sample.” The woman was shocked. “Such a thing you ask a Christian virtuous woman? Such a crude person would suggest such a thing? He must be a barnyard animal, not a gentleman.” The matchmaker, trying to earn a fee, said, “He’s a pragmatic, man. After all, to him it’s not a big deal… just a sample.” She thought a minute. “A pragmatic man, is he? So tell him I don’t give samples. I can give him 50 or 60 references, if he wants, though.
Vote:
has 54.09 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: animal, christian, dirty, husband, women
Q: Why do men fart louder than women? A: because they have a microphone and two speakers.
Vote:
has 78.22 % from 427 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, fart, men, women
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you. The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."
Vote:
has 73.89 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: dirty, time, wife
A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm. He walks up to his wife with it and says, "This is the pig I've been f*cking'." His wife says, "That's a duck." He quickly replies, "I wasn't talking to you."...
Vote:
has 82.68 % from 800 votes. More jokes about: dirty, duck, wife
What do dogs and women have in common? They both like 12-inch bones.
Vote:
has 52.77 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: dirty
My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move. She: "What are you doing?" Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
Vote:
has 57.18 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Q: How big are the pastro's beds? A: Oh c'mon, it knows every little kid.
Vote:
has 22.93 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: dirty, kids, religious, sex
Q: Why doesn't Smokey the bear have any kids? A: Because every time his wife gets hot, he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel.
Vote:
has 58.35 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: dirty, kids, wife
A guy walks into a bar with an alligator. It's about 10 feet long. The bartender flips out and says, "Hey buddy, you gotta get that son of a b*tch outta here. It's going to bite one of my customers and I'm going to get sued." The guy says, "No no no, it's a tame alligator. I'll prove it to you." He picks up the alligator and puts it on the bar. Then he unzips his pants, pulls out his package and sticks it in the alligator's mouth. The alligator just keeps his mouth open. After about 5 minutes, he pulls it out of the alligator's mouth and zips up his pants and says, "See, I told you it was a tame alligator. Anybody else want to try it?" The drunk down at the end of the bar says, "Yah, I'd like to try it but I don't think I can hold my mouth open that long!"
Vote:
has 72.93 % from 217 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, dirty, gay