A man goes into a library and asks where he can find books on suicide.
‘First row on the left,’ replied the librarian.
The man replies, ‘But I’ve already looked in that section.
It’s empty.’
‘I’m not surprised,’ says the librarian.
‘They don’t often bring them back.'
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Knock-Knock
Who is there?
A long penis with a naked head.
Come in please we were waiting for you.
Vote:
Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!
A woman walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms.
He replies, "Yes we do.
Would you like to buy some?"
She responds, "No sir, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?"
A woman and baby are in the doctors surgery, the doc is concerned about the babys weight, "Is he bottle fed or breast fed?
The woman replies, "Breast fed."
The doc gets her to strip down to her waist so he can examine her breasts.
He pinches her nipples and sucks and rubs both breasts for a while ...
"No wonder the baby is underweight, you have no milk."
Woman replies, "I know, Im his granny ... but Im glad I came!"
How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?
Grease her hips, and throw in a Twinkie.
Yo mama so fat you cant tell if she got a penis or a vagina.
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across?
A: A double dirty crosser.
Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.
Charlie marries a virgin.
On their wedding night, he's on fire, and wants some dirty fun so he gets naked, jumps into bed, and immediately begins groping her.
"Charles, I expect you to be as mannerly in bed as you are at the dinner table."
So, Charlie folds his hands on his lap and says, "Is this better?"
"Much better!" she replies with a smile.
"Okay, then," he says, "now will you please pass the pussy."