Always go to other people’s funerals, or they won’t go to yours.
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Two foreign immigrants have just arrived in the United States by boat and one says to the other, "I hear that the people of this country actually eat dogs."
"Odd," her companion replies, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do."
Nodding emphatically, one of the immigrants points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk toward the cart.
"Two dogs, please," she says.
The vendor is only too pleased to oblige, wraps both hot dogs in foil and hands them over the counter.
Excited, the companions hurry to a bench and begin to unwrap their "dogs."
One of them opens the foil and begins to blush.
Staring at it for a moment, she turns to her friend and whispers cautiously, "What part did you get?"
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Why do Mexicans eat beans for dinner?
So they can take bubble baths.
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What's black and red, wears high top Reeboks and cant go through a revolving door?
A nigger with a spear through his head.
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Q: How do you fit 60,000 Jews in a minivan?
A: With a dustpan.
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A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island.
After one month the woman says:
"I can not proceed in this way."
And she suicides herself.
After another month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they bury the woman.
The next month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they dig up the woman.
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Joke has 21.56 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, desert island, disgusting, navy
Q: What's the slowest thing on 80 wheels?
A: A Mexican funeral with only two sets of jumper cables.
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Went to a Muslim birthday party the other day.
It was great fun, we blew up a bouncy castle and then had a really intense game of pass the parcel.
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I took my grandma to a fish spa center where the little fish eat your dead skin for only $45.
It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.
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"I'm going to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage. But it is just a formality."
"Who told you that?"
"Gynecologist."
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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender?
A: I don't know, I just like to hear them scream.
Q: How do you get them out?
A: Chips.
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