Death is God’s way of saying, ‘Hey, you’re not alive any more.’
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Why did Beyonce sing 'to the left', 'to the left'?
Because black people have no rights...
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How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf?
He became a vegetarian.
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What is the differance between a dead baby and a VHS tape?
The VHS tape don't stink when you leave it out in the sun.
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What's black and red, wears high top Reeboks and cant go through a revolving door?
A nigger with a spear through his head.
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Q: Why are Germans bad cooks?
A: The only good one killed himself.
Q: How is spinach like anal sex?
A: Chances are if you're forced to have it as a child you are probably going to hate it as an adult.
How do you get a baby to run faster?
Chase it with the lawn mower.
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Sylvester Stallone's son was found dead.
I guess we have a good plot for the next Rambo movie now.
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There were four people on a plane.
One of them, the Pilot.
The other was the president of the United States –Obama, The oldest man in the world, and a little boy.
The plane was about to crash and the only option for survival was to jump!
But there were only three parachutes.
The Pilot took a parachute and said, "I'm the pilot, so I should get a parachute."
And he jumped off.
Then Obama grabs a and jumps saying, "Since I'm the president, I get one too!"
And he jumps.
The little boy then grabs a parachute and hands it to the old man.
The man declines, saying, "No, boy, take it. I'm too old anyway."
The boy answers, "What? No! Obama took my back-pack!"
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Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history?
Hitler.
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