Joke #4403

‘Its been a rough day. I put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom.’ Rodney Dangerfield
Vote:
has 71.95 % from 337 votes. More jokes about: sex

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

George W. Bush and Bill Clinton both decided to have biographies written about them. George called him "The Three Most Powerful Men - Bush, Dick, and Colon". Bill called his "Sex Between the Bushes"
Vote:
has 72.69 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, political, sex
A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
Vote:
has 70.46 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: medical, men, money, sex, women
Q: What do gay guys have in common with bungee jumpers? A: If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit!
Vote:
has 73.37 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty, gay, sex, sport
A young Alabama man goes to a drug store and says to the pharmact: "I got a hot date tonight, an’ I need me some petection. How much is a pack a’ them rubbers gonna cost me?" The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of condoms is $4.99 with tax." "TACKS!" the shocked redneck says. "Gawd a’ mighty, don’t they stay on by themselves!"
Vote:
has 64.17 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: dating, drug, money, sex, tax
The wife bought a new see through nighty, wore it without any underclothes and came swinging before the husband. Aroused Husband says, "You look so beautiful and sexy my darling." The wife says, "I know that, I tried it the same way at the store and the salesman was the first one to tell me that."
Vote:
has 83.45 % from 1056 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, sex, wife
A guy goes into this bar, sits down and orders a drink. While waiting, he sees a guy sitting at the bar who has a very big muscular body but a little tiny head. So, he asks the guy, "How is it that you have such a huge body and a small head?" The guy replied, "I was walking along the beach one day and I came across this bottle buried halfway in the sand. So I picked it up, brushed away the sand, and out popped this fine female genie. She said she would grant me three wishes for releasing her." "For my first wish, I asked for ten-million dollars, and POOF right there on the sand was $10,000,00." "For my second wish, I asked for a luxury yacht, and POOF right there on the ocean was a 90-foot yacht." "Finally for my third wish, I asked to have sex with the genie, but she said that genies were not allowed to indulge in that kind of activities." So, I said, "c'mon, how about a little head?"
Vote:
has 81.51 % from 194 votes. More jokes about: bar, genie, money, sex, ugly
My wife and I really love bondage. She loves it because she's a kinky bitch. I love it because I get to gag her for a couple of hours.
Vote:
has 73.34 % from 208 votes. More jokes about: love, sex, wife
Little Johnny, "Why are you so fat?" Little Billy, "Cause Every time I fuck ur mom she gives me a doughnut."
Vote:
has 58.93 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
Grandmother is so stupid, she’s gone on the pill because she doesn’t want any more grandchildren.
Vote:
has 49.76 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: sex
She was hungry for love and didn’t know where her next male was coming from.
Vote:
has 32.14 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: sex