What dog can jump higher than a building? Anydog, buildings can't jump!
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space? Steer Wars.
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
How do you get a hundred cows in a barn? You hang up a bingo sign!
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
Once, on the set of Walker Texas Ranger, a goat fell over dead. Chuck Norris ran up to the goat and beard rubbed it back to life.
I heard my tire thumping, I thought it was flat. When I looked at my tire I discovered your cat. Sorry...
Yo mama is so stupid, when I offered her animal crackers she said no thanks, I'm a vegetarian.