Why are women like parking spaces?
Because all the best ones are taken... and the rest are handicapped.
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Q: What did one female terrorist say to the other?
A: "Does my bomb look big in this?"
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Q: How do you know if a girl is pregnant?
A: Shove a tampon and see if all of the cotton is picked.
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What is the difference between men and women?
A woman wants a man to satisfy their every little need.
A man wants all the women to satisfy their one and only little need.
Q: Why do women have two holes so close together?
A: In case you miss.
What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A whine and cheese party.
One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch:
"My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE."
It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York.
So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him.
When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I'm looking for LOVE."
The policeman arrested her on the spot.
For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free”.
Here’s an update for you.
Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why?
Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire
Pig, just to get a little sausage…
I can't see the point of going to a lap-dancing club.
If I wanted a woman who would take my money and sexually frustrate me, I would get married.
Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
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