Joke #4763

A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store clerk called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedics rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency open heart bypass surgery. He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the Catholic Hospital. A nun was seated next to his bed holding a clipboard loaded with several forms, and a pen. She asked him how he was going to pay for his treatment. “Do you have health insurance?” she asked. He replied in a raspy voice, “No health insurance.” The nun asked, “Do you have money in the bank?” He replied, “No money in the bank.” Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?” asked the irritated nun. He said, “I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun.” The nun became agitated and announced loudly, “Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.” The patient replied, “Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-in-law.”
Vote: has 82.48 % from 139 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you gonna eat that?
Vote: has 33.50 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move. She: "What are you doing?" Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
Vote: has 77.89 % from 840 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, sex
Boy: My magic watch says that you don't have any underwear on. Girl: Well its wrong... Boy: Guess my watch is 15 minutes fast
Vote: has 58.06 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, time
Q: What do you call Bin Laden when he lost his virginity? A: Osama Bin Laiden.
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, religious, sex
Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
Vote: has 39.94 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, dirty, winter, women
The manager hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet and polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open. While leaving the room, she courteously said, “Oh, sir, did you know that your barracks door is open?” He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his new employee. Calling her in, he asked, “By the way, Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door open this morning, did you also see a soldier standing at attention?” The secretary, who was quite witty, replied, “Why, no sir. all I saw was a little, disabled veteran, sitting on two duffel bags!”
Vote: has 85.71 % from 379 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
I think I just evolved into Homo Erectus.
Vote: has 31.08 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
During a war warrior shouted against 3 ladies Warrior: I am going to r*pe you all. Younger lady: But please leave our grand mother. Grand mother: Shut up, war is war.
Vote: has 76.50 % from 237 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
Vote: has 55.34 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, fat, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!
Vote: has 81.76 % from 1511 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty