Joke #11606

Q: What's a horny pirate's worst nightmare? A: A sunken chest with no booty!
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has 80.44 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, pirate

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A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's steering wheel stuck to the front of his pants. The bartender asks, "Hey, doesn't that hurt?" The pirate growls, "Aye, it's drivin' me nuts."
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has 67.13 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, pirate
A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel on his penis. The bartender says to him, "You know you've got a ship's wheel on your penis?" And the pirate says, "Argh, I know. It drives me nuts."
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has 57.82 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, pirate
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?" "So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuck."
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has 36.82 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, love, music, time
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity? A: The crayons are still sticky.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, disgusting, sex
My girlfriends dad asked me what I do. Apparently, "your daughter" wasn't the right answer.
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has 67.46 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty
They are going to play golf at the business meeting. The guy flies out there a day early. He's got all day in Japan so he decides he wants to get himself a geisha. He goes to a house of ill repute and finds what he's looking for. He takes her in back and starts doing his thing. The girl starts going crazy. She starts yelling, "Machigatta ana! Machigatta ana!" He thinks, "This girl is loving this." Next day in the golf course he hits a hole in one. He doesn't know any Japanese so he yells, "Machigatta ana!" The Japanese guys ask him, "What do you mean wrong hole?"
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has 70.73 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: dirty, ethnic, golf, sex
Q: How do pirates make their money? A: By hook or by crook!
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: money, pirate
Yo' Mama is so flat, pirates can't wait to get their hands her a sunken chest.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: pirate, Yo mama
There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant. "It's in case I get shot. I don't want you crew members to see blood and freak out." "That's very sensible, sir." At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile ships on the horizon. The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned. "Get my brown pants."
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has 84.64 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: beauty, life, pirate
Q: Who was the most famous pirate octopus? A: Captain Squid.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, pirate