An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up...
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What do you call it when one rabbit challenges another rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?
A hare dare.
Q. Why don't lions eat clowns?
A. Because they taste funny.
A man enters a little country store and sees a sign reading, ‘Danger!
Beware of Dog’.
He then sees an old hound dog lying asleep on the floor.
‘Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?’ says the man to the shopkeeper.
‘Yep,’ replies the shopkeeper.
‘Before I posted that sign, everyone kept tripping over him.’
Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in.
Which one do you let in?
The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!
How do you know when there's a rabbit in your bed?
You can smell the carrots on his breath.
What do cows get when they do all their chores?
Mooney.
The little snail begs for his mother:
Mother, please let me pass the rail road!
Thunder dear, not now.
In five hours the train passes.
I feel like every nature documentary is directed by a psychopath.
"Here's the cutest baby animal ever."
"Now let's watch something eat it."
A Girl was towelling her wet pussy.
She enjoyed it so much that she began to rub it vigorously until...
...the pussy cried "Meow" and runs away.
Moral Lessons
1. Be kind to Animals
2. Always keep your thoughts clean...
A Football team was on the field during practice, when to their surprise, a big turkey suddenly walked up to the coach and demanded a tryout. "Are you crazy," hollered the coach, "we don’t give tryouts to turkeys."
Before he knew it the turkey started dashing towards the football and made a fantastic catch.
"That was amazing," exclaimed the coach.
"I have never seen anything like that! How much do you want for a year?"
"Don’t worry about money," said the turkey, "let me just ask you something, does the season go past thanksgiving?"
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