Joke #4799

There is no logical foundation of mathematics, and Gödel has proved it!

An engineer and a physicist are in a hot-air balloon. After a few hours they lose track of where they are and descend to get directions. They yell to a jogger, "Hey, can you tell us where we're at?" After a few moments the jogger responds, "You're in a hot-air balloon." The engineer says, "You must be a mathematician." The jogger, shocked, responds, "yeah, how did you know I was a mathematician?" "Because, it took you far too long to come up with your answer, it was 100% correct, and it was completely useless."

Once you go asian you never miss an equation.

Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911? A: Because she couldn't find the 11

Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.

If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have? Plenty of milk.

Teacher asks student: What is the half of 8? Student: Miss horizontally or vertically? Teacher: What do mean? Student: Horizontally it is 0 and vertically it is 3.

A mathematician, physicist and economist after Titanic crash on uninhabited island in the middle of Atlantic ocean. Starving to death they found a can of roastbeef. They start debating how to open the can without can-opener. Mathematician suggests to drop the can from the cliff to open it. Physicist proposes to heat the can on bonfire. Economist: "Let's suppose the can is opened...."

Q: What is the most erotic number? A: 2110593! Q: Why? A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3.

If you had a million dollars and gave away one quarter, and another quarter, and then another quarter, how much would you have left? A million dollars minus 75 cents.

The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?" Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!"