There is no logical foundation of mathematics, and Gödel has proved it!
What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
Q. What mode do you use in maths? A. Multi-plyers.
"What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?" "She no longer is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me." "I don't believe that she cheated on you!" "Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns..."
On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
Teacher asks student: What is the half of 8? Student: Miss horizontally or vertically? Teacher: What do mean? Student: Horizontally it is 0 and vertically it is 3.
Son: Dad, it's so cold in here! Father: Go stand in the corner. Son: Why? Father: The corner is 90 degrees.
"Students nowadays are so clueless", the math professor complains to a colleague. "Yesterday, a student came to my office hours and wanted to know if General Calculus was a Roman war hero..."
Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.
I used to think maths was useless, but then one day I realised that decimals had a point.
First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra.