American tourist in Moscow found himself needing to get rid of a large supply of garbage from his recent stay at an apartment. After a long search, he just couldn't find any place to discard of it. So, he just went down one of the side streets to dump it there.
Yet, he was stopped by a Moscow police officer, who said, "Hey you, what are you doing?"
"I have to throw this away," replied the tourist.
"You can't throw it away here. Look, follow me," the policeman offered.
The police officer led him to a beautiful garden with lots of grass, pretty flowers, and manicured hedges. "Here," said the cop, "dump all the garbage you want."
The American shrugs, opens up the large bags of garbage, and dumps them right on the flowers.
"Thanks for giving me a place to dump this stuff. This is very nice of you. Is this Russian courtesy?" asked the tourist.
"No. This is the American Embassy."
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A man on a beach sees a shark near a child in the shallows.
Ignoring personal safety, he dives in the water and, with his bare hands, kills the shark.
He brings the tot to shore and is met with tumultuous applause from spectators.
"Geez, mate" says a reporter "You should get a medal. What part of Australia are you from?"
Modestly our hero says: "Actually I'm from England."
The next days newspaper headline says "Pommy mongrel kills child's pet"
Your mama is so black you can only see her eyes and teeth at night.
Vote:
Why are black people good at basketball?
Because they run, shoot and steal.
Why shouldn't white people go swimming?
Because crackers get soggy when wet.
Yo' Mama is so fat, NASA used her to plug a black hole.
Q: Whats the difference between a black person and an apple?
A: The apple falls from the tree.
Vote:
Q: Why are native Americans effective strippers?
A: When they dance they make it rain.
Why can't Chinese couples have Caucasian babies?
Because two Wongs don't make a white!
Q: What is the official sport of Mexico?
A: Border jump