Why was the Blonde's bellybutton bruised?
Her husband was a blonde too!
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How did the blonde burn her nose?
Bobbing for chips.
Q: What's the difference between a lesbian finger-fucking a blonde and a Schwinn at the side of the road?
A: One's a bike in a ditch, and the other's...
Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel!
A blonde working in the coffin industry was thinking of various ways to improve her business.
She thought perhaps a good way to do it would be to emulate the success of the fashion store across the street which had done very well with it's new "Buy 1, Get 1 Free" deal.
Soon, a man walks in.
"I would like a coffin for my father. But these coffins are very expensive!"
"Well, sir, you'll be happy to know we have a 'Buy 1, Get 1 Free' deal!"
The customer left.
What did the blonde say about blonde jokes?
She said they were pretty good, but might offend some Puerto Ricans.
Q: Why do blondes have see-through lunch box tops?
A: So they can tell if they are going to work or going home, while on the bus.
Q: How do you make a blonde's brain the size of a pea?
A: Inflate it.
A blonde guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom.
He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting.
"What's up?" he says.
"I'm having a heart attack," cries the woman.
He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his 4-year-old son comes up and says,"Daddy!
Daddy!
Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got no clothes on!"
The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door.
Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the closet floor.
You rotten bastard, "says the husband,"my wife's having a heart attack and you're running around naked scaring the kids!!!
Why did the blonde throw breadcrumbs in the toilet?
To feed the toilet duck!
Two blondes finds a mirror on the sidewalk.
The first blonde picks it up, looks into it, and says, "Hey, I know this person! I've seen her somewhere before."
The second blonde takes the mirror, looks into it, and says, "Duh! Of course you have that's me!"