Q: What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? A: They're both empty from the neck up.
In a fancy Paris restaurant, there is a magical wish-granting mirror. But it only grants wishes if you tell the truth if you lie, you disappear. One day, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead enter the restaurant and decide to try out the mirror. The brunette goes first. "I think I'm the smartest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The redhead goes up to try. "I think I'm the prettiest woman on earth." "POOF!" She disappears. The blonde goes up. "I think..." "POOF!"
Q. How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? A1. "What's a light bulb?" A2. One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her. A3. Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!"
A blonde, a brunet and a red head were in a competition to see who could swim 60 miles accross a river. The brunet swims 30 miles, gets a cramp and drowns. The red head swims accross 30 miles, gets bit by a shark and drowns. The blonde swims 30 miles accross, says: "I'm tired." and swims 30 miles back.
Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering? The noise gave her a headache.
how come blondes don't wear tampons? so their crabs don't go bungie jumping.
Why do the blondes spill water over the computer? They want to navigate over the internet.
Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer? So she could keep the refrigerator cold.
Why did the blonde roast a chicken for three and a half days? The instructions said ‘cook it for half an hour per pound’, and she weighed 125.
What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates? A mobile sperm bank!
A blonde comes home to find her husband in bed with a redhead. She grabs a gun and holds it to her own head. The husband begs her not to shoot herself. The blonde shouts at her husband, ‘Shut up! You’re next!’