Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold?
A: Sits around a candle
Q: What does she do when it gets really cold?
A: Lights it
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Q: Why was the blonde afraid to have phone sex?
A: Because the condom wouldn't fit over the phone.
A blonde takes her typewriter to the doctor.
"Doc, I'm afraid my typewriter is pregnant."
The doctor asks, "Why in the world would you think that?"
She says, "Because it's started missing its period."
A husband is driving with her blonde wife, the husband says "Can you stick your head out the window if the blinker works?" T
hen the blonde sticks her head out the window and replies, "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes..".
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Q: Why do blondes have "TGIF" on their shoes?
A: "Toes go in first."
A blonde's house was on fire.
She called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please!
My house is burning! Hurry!"
The operator said, "Okay, calm down and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"
The blonde answered, "Duh, in that big red truck!"
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead were trying out for a new NASA experiment on sending women to different planets.
First, they called the brunette in and asked her a question.
"If you could go to any planet, what planet would you want to go to and why?"
After pondering the question she answered, "I would like to go to Mars because it seems so interesting with all the recent news about possible extra terrestrial life on the planet."
They said "well okay, thank you." And told her that they would get back to her.
Next, the redhead entered the room and the NASA people asked her the same question. In reply, "I would like to go to Saturn to see all of its rings." Again, "thank you" and they would get back to her.
Finally, the blond entered the room and they asked her the same question they asked the brunette and the redhead.
She thought for a while and replied, "I would like to go to the sun."
The people from NASA replied, "why, don't you know that if you went to the sun you would burn to death?"
The blond smirked and put her hands on her hips. "Are you guys dumb? I'd go at night!"
Three blondes are stranded on an island.
A fairy comes along and says that she will grant each person a wish.
So the first blonde says she wants to be really smart so she digs and finds a cell phone and calls the Army.
The second blonde says that she wants to be even smarter so she finds a flair and sets it off.
The third blonde says that she wants to be even smarter than both of them, so the fairy changes her hair color to black and she says,"Let's go over the bridge."
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A blonde walks into a restaurant to get some dinner, and while she's deciding on what she wants a waitress comes up.
The blonde looks up and notices the waitress's name tag on her shirt.
"Gee, that's nice.
What did you name the other one?"