Joke #5116

I told my friend that she drew her eyebrows on too high. She looked surprised.
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has 68.72 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: women

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The waitress asked how I would like my coffee. I told her: "like my woman - hot and black".
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A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house. Exhausted from the afternoon's activities, they fell asleep and awoke at around 8 p.m. As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied and he slipped into his shoes and drove home. "Where have you been?" demanded his wife when he entered the house. "Darling," replied the man, "I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary. I fell asleep in her bed and didn't wake up until eight o'clock." The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, "You liar! You've been playing golf!"
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Question: What should a man do if his wife runs into the room during a baseball match and keeps disturbing you? Answer: Shorten the chain.
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Q: If a man crashes his car into a woman who's fault is it? A: Well what was the man doing driving in the kitchen...
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Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, "I hear that you’ve been telling people that I’m ugly!" "Oh NO! I’ve just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive." "I also heard that you’ve been calling me fat?" "Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear those stripes makes you look larger than you really are." "I’ve also heard that you’re saying that my husband has a wart on his dick!" "Oh NO! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"
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Q:What's the definition of mixed emotions? A:When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your brand new car.
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If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses
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Man to a woman: "Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger is?" Woman: "No." Man: "Lets have lunch sometime…"
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Q: What do you call a 900-pound woman with a yeast infection? A: A whopper with cheese.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: women
Q: What kinds of people don't get invited to blonde parties? A: Women!
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