Joke #5128

Q. How do men define a long-term relationship? A. A second date.
Vote: has 59.79 % from 4 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What's the biggest difference between men and women ? Men are crabby all month long.
Vote: has 21.85 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q: Why did God create Adam before he created eve? A: Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.
Vote: has 77.74 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
Vote: has 68.87 % from 109 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: medical, men, money, sex, women
HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN Compliment her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, wine and dine her, buy gifts for her, listen to her, respect her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN Arrive naked... with beer.
Vote: has 88.37 % from 648 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beer, love, men, romantic, women
Q: Why do men like blonde jokes? A: Because they can understand them.
Vote: has 48.02 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
A gentleman was having some physical problems and his doctor told him that he had to drink warm water with Epsom salts one hour before breakfast. At the end of a week he returned and the doctor asked if he was feeling better. The man said that he actually felt worse. “Did you drink warm salt water an hour before breakfast each day?” the Doc asked. “No,” replied the man somberly, letting out a sigh. “I could only do about 15 minutes!”
Vote: has 72.24 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, food, men, time
A guy is stranded on an island with only a Doberman and a pig for company. There's plenty of food and water, and the weather is beautiful, so he's doing alright, but after a few months he gets lonely. The pig starts to look more and more attractive, soft, pink flesh, round buttocks. But every time this poor guy makes an advance towards the pig, the Doberman snarls at him and once almost bit his leg. Very frustrating. One day the guy sees a speck on the horizon, so he swims out there and it turns out to be a dinghy, cast adrift, and in the bottom of the boat is a beautiful woman, unconscious. He drags her to shore and brings her into his hut and slowly nurses her back health. Finally she is well enough to walk and she says to him "Thank you, thank you for saving my life. I don't know how I can ever repay you. I'll do anything for you, anything, just name it." The guy thinks for a minute and says, "Would you mind taking my dog for a walk?"
Vote: has 71.97 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, desert island, dog, food, men
Q: When is the only time a guy can multi-task? A: When he's watching porn, masturbating, and keeping an eye on the door at the same time...
Vote: has 80.44 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, men, time
There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
What is the difference between a man and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, fish, men