Joke #3170

I’ve know John a long time and am considered a bit of a father figure to him. I have watched him crawl around on his knees, drink from a bottle and I’ve cleaned up after him but enough about the Bachelor Party.
Vote:
has 40.95 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Why do men like love at first sight? It saves them a lot of time.
Vote:
has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: men
A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."
Vote:
has 79.54 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: men
Why are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half time.
Vote:
has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: husband, men, time
A gentleman was having some physical problems and his doctor told him that he had to drink warm water with Epsom salts one hour before breakfast. At the end of a week he returned and the doctor asked if he was feeling better. The man said that he actually felt worse. “Did you drink warm salt water an hour before breakfast each day?” the Doc asked. “No,” replied the man somberly, letting out a sigh. “I could only do about 15 minutes!”
Vote:
has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: doctor, food, men, time
This could be considered the ideal world for many men: His son on the cover of a box of Wheaties. His mistress in the centerfold of Playboy. A picture of his wife on the milk carton.
Vote:
has 74.54 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, family, life, men
A man sits on a bus looking ashamed. The man next to him notices and asks what is wrong. He says that when he went to buy the bus ticket, the woman serving him had the most unbelievable breasts, so he got flustered and asked for two tickets to Tittsburgh instead of Pittsburgh. The man next to him laughs, "Don't worry about that. We all make Freudian slips. This morning I was having breakfast with my wife. I meant to say, 'Pass the salt,' but I accidently said, 'You f**king bitch, you ruined my life.'"
Vote:
has 74.51 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: life, men, wife, women
A policeman pulled a car over and told the driver he had won $5,000 dollars in the seatbelt competition. "What are you going to do with the money?" asked the policeman. "Well, I guess I'm going to get a drivers license", he answered. "Oh, don't listen to him," said a woman in the passenger seat, "He's a smart aleck when he's drunk." Then the guy in the backseat said, "I knew we wouldn't get far in a stolen car." At that moment there was a knock from the trunk and a voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"
Vote:
has 82.20 % from 259 votes. More jokes about: cop, drunk, men, money
Woman to her husband while at it: "Please say dirty things to me!" Man: "Bath, Kitchen, Living room..."
Vote:
has 69.85 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, mean, men, women
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across? A: A double dirty crosser.
Vote:
has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, travel
Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are man's best friend. So which is the dumber sex?
Vote:
has 34.09 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men