Joke #8

How can you tell if a man is lying? You can see his lips moving.

Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"

Definition of a man with manners – he gets out of the bath to pee.

A wife says, "Hey! Look at that funny guy who's been drinking a lot." The husband responds, "Who is he?" The wife answers, "Well, five years ago, he was my boyfriend and I denied him for marriage." "Oh my God! He's still celebrating his freedom!" says the husband.

If you want to know why men are called the 'opposite sex', express an opinion!

Two friends meet each other on the street.”Hello! Where are you coming from?” asked Bill.” Oh, don’t ask me! I’m coming from the cemetery. I just buried my mother-in-law” replied Sid. ”I’m so sorry!” said Bill, “But why is your face scratched all over?”. ”It wasn’t so easy!” said Sid, “She put on a hell of a fight!”

What did God say after creating man? I can do so much better.

What's the quickest way to lose 190 pounds of ugly fat? Divorce him.

Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across? A: A double dirty crosser.

Why do men buy electric lawn mowers? So they can find their way back to the house.

What is the difference between men and women? A woman wants a man to satisfy their every little need. A man wants all the women to satisfy their one and only little need.