What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding?
A baby in a microwave.
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Similar jokes
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My dad died on 9-11.
He was the best amateur bomber on Iraq's flight team.
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What do you call a baby on a stick?
A Kebabie.
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I was walking down the street to a video store last night to rent a porno movie when I saw a woman being raped.
Saved myself a fiver.
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Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
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A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly.
Suddenly, Lorraine died.
At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."
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What do you call a van with 5 faggots in it?
The AIDS team.
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A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home.
In the den was a stuffed lion.
The visiting hunter asked, “When did you bag him?”
The host said proudly, “That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my ex-wife.”
“What’s he stuffed with,” asked the visiting hunter.
“My ex-wife” replied the hunter.
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What's the difference between a police officer and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone else, you know it's been fired.
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I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend today.
I had to drop the bomb two or three times before she finally got it.
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"Excuse me, how do I get to the hospital quickly?"
"Just stand in the middle of the road for a while."
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