What's got four wheels, smokes and squeals?
A bus load of babies on fire.
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The cannibal priest told his flock to close their eyes and say grace.
"For whosoever we are about to eat, may the Lord make us truly thankful."
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What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag?
1 dead baby in 10 bags.
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There were four people on a plane.
One of them, the Pilot.
The other was the president of the United States –Obama, The oldest man in the world, and a little boy.
The plane was about to crash and the only option for survival was to jump!
But there were only three parachutes.
The Pilot took a parachute and said, "I'm the pilot, so I should get a parachute."
And he jumped off.
Then Obama grabs a and jumps saying, "Since I'm the president, I get one too!"
And he jumps.
The little boy then grabs a parachute and hands it to the old man.
The man declines, saying, "No, boy, take it. I'm too old anyway."
The boy answers, "What? No! Obama took my back-pack!"
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Q: What did one casket say to the sick casket?
A: Is that you coughin'?
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What is the difference between a fridge and a kid?
A fridge doesn't shout when you put your meat inside it.
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Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles?
A: Because his wife died.
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They say the surest way to a man's heart is through the stomach.
But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.
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Q: What has 2 arms, 3 legs, and 4 feet?
A: The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
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Daddy to his son:
I don't care if you are dating a black girl - they are all pink on the inside.
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Why did Beyonce sing 'to the left', 'to the left'?
Because black people have no rights...
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